The Hypnotist - Viewed 258 times

I saw your name in the Yellow Pages, and It said you're good at this stuff, so I just, I gotta give it a shot, just kick this whole cigarette thing... it's finally, like, affecting everything I do, I can't run, I can't play basketball and all that stuff like that, so I, I gotta give it up. All right, Gary, why don't you just have a seat here and sit down and just relax -- what I do is hypnosis. let yourself sit back and relax and sink into the chair, and , um, just feel comfortable and trust me. and I just want you to again relax and try to concentrate on nothing. Okay? That's it. Now I'm gonna count backwards from five to zero -- of subconsciousness -- you're very comfortable, I'll be counting back from five, I just want you to relax, and just think of nothing. Close your eyes. Keep your eyes closed. Okay. Now. We're very comfortable. Five [small fart], we're thinking of nothing except being comfortable and nothing's bothering us. Okay. When I say the word "relax," listen to me, you're sinking, you're sinking, [medium fart] You're very stressed -- you're very stressed. Okay, four, we're relaxing, we're relaxing, you're very comfortable, you're very, very soothed. Okay. Four, three...[fart] the vinyl -- it's a new couch -- please, just try and concentrate. Okay. And we're very sleepy, we're relaxed, thinking nothing bothers us, nothing bothers us -- [several farts] I'm just having a tough time concentrating -- I can't concentrate when you're doing that. We're relaxing now. Just relax -- let it go, don't focus on anything else, just concentrate on what we're doing here. Three, two, relax, relax, that's it, just relax [fart], we're relaxing now -- it's getting a little irritating -- Let me just step out a second here. as I leave, we're relaxing, still relaxing, we're to two, and all we're thinking about is healthy, fresh air. Freshness. Breathing in. Breathing in deep, letting out. [fart] But okay, okay, fine, thank you. All right, you feel very comfortable, you're sinking into the chair, we're relaxing, one [long fart], and we're coming down to zero and -- [Dr. Stewart: We're not here to pick sides, we're not here to pick sides, that was you, and maybe we could deal with this in another session, but right now we're dealing with the smoking, and, um, let's not worry about anything else that's going down -- [Gary Phelps: OK, I've just gotta kick this habit. [Gary Phelps: Oh my god -- what did you eat? It smells like baby food -- that one probably squirted out a little into the pants, but we'll just continue with thte floating [fart] -- yeah, that was definitely a squirt -- but here we go, one, zero, we are under. Are you relaxed? You're under a deep trance, you will not smoke anymore, you will just feel healthy from now on, and you'll be breathing in nothing but fresh air, and you will not smell anything in this room, it wasn't me, it wasn't me farting [fart] -- that was not me -- You're gonna have to stop doing that, sir. It's just very hard for me to listen to you when you're -- nothing but fresh pastures and fields, and here we go [long fart] All right, and now we're going to count back up, up one to five, you will snap out of this, and you won't remember this, especially the smell, the smell was from you. All right? And here we go. Zero, we're coming out of it, you're waking up slowly, your eyes are opening, one, you're feeling good, and when you wake up, you'll feel wide awake and perfect you'll feel whole and [fart] all-righty, I ripped that one out there and I apologize. I ripped a good one there. That was a nice out..